Day 32

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” – Philippians‬ 4‬:6‬ NIV‬‬

Every night I kneel by my bedside and pray to God. With each prayer I make I have expectations, some more lofty than others. Those expectations aren’t always met, but I’m pretty confident that is a reflection on my expectations, not God’s inability to meet them. My great hope in these moments is that He hears me, but I don’t always have faith that he will.

In these prayers I thank God for all of the things that he has blessed me with: friends, family, a home, a job. Important things no doubt, and certainly things to be eternally thankful for. Yet THINGS nonetheless, and we all know that we can’t take things with us when we go. Jesus doesn’t shy away from reminding us about this fact often. In Mark 10:25 He says, “It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.”

We spend a lot of time in our lives, especially here in Washington, DC, trying to “have it all.” I think, though, that we don’t spend enough time thinking about the “it all” that we really want. If “it all” means first and foremost the house, the job, etc. then chasing those things can often times be what gets us into trouble. It’s the desire to put all the wrong “it alls” first that hurts us. When we realize that these “it alls” are about as worthless as it gets when we’re standing in front of St. Peter we can finally come to terms with the “it all” that we should be praying for first. Love, hope, peace, grace.

George Eliot wrote in a note to her love that, “You will find that I can be satisfied with very little, if I am delivered from the dread of losing it.” Jesus delivers us from the dread of losing anything, including our homes, jobs, and even our lives, and giving ourselves to Him can teach us how to live with little to nothing “at all”…but Him.

What I now aspire to pray for each night is that God will reorder my priorities and show me what he wants from me, so that I can go out and do his will, appreciate the things that He has blessed me with, and grow in faith not only that He hears me, but that I hear Him.